Tuesday, March 2, 2010

Debbie Downer makes Owlettes

Untitled, Unfinished
There's nothing left in this world
Nothing to take, or give
The skies are gone, the ground gave way
Not even oxygen to live

Yet, here you remain
With your memories of sun
And thoughts of those you loved
But what to do with these,
when the world's come undone?

Recall the warmth of life
Leaves that changed with season
The chill that a breeze sent up your spine
Stars that acted as your beacon

I'm having trouble finishing things lately. I have a lot of unfinished poems, projects, meals...

I feel like part of me is slowly falling back into a depression. I've been getting the urge to cry a lot more lately for no particular reason and I've been letting my mind wander to particularly dark thoughts. I even had a panic attack a few weeks ago. I can't remember when, but it was one of the worst I've ever had.

I'm fighting it with all I have though. I'm working out as often as I can manage, which is almost daily. Sometimes I get too lazy and talk myself out of it, but there is still part of me always fighting for it because I know that it helps. The endorphins obviously help keep me from getting down.

The past few days have been tough though. I've been letting the darkness eat me up and prevent me from doing things to make it better. I just let myself fall into it for a while, but on the upside that time made me see some things differently. The perspective is good and bad at the same time, but overall it might help me.

On the brighter side, I've been making these little owls (pictured above, duh)--owlettes to be exact. They are the cutest things and I love making them. They're a good distraction and their adorableness is a good reminder to just smile sometimes. Smile dammit! It's good for you.

I hope they make you smile too.

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